Then I would bring them back as zombies... or perhaps in the case of I AM SLEEPLESS: SIM 299, they would mutate into Splicers.
I saw this picture making the rounds on Facebook and had to share it. Although Scorpion Petting sounds exciting, I don't suggest it.
With that said, I often hear other authors giving the advice to never read the reviews for your books. I agree with this, if you have thin skin, can't handle rejection, or have thousands of reviews and not enough time to read them all (which would be an awesome problem to have).
But if you can handle the bad reviews and occasional trolls, without falling into a deep depression that requires a healthy dose of Prozac, I find reading reviews to be very informative and helpful in discovering my strengths and weaknesses as an author. I won't agree with everything left in a review, and that's okay because I understand you can't please everyone and you are writing to please yourself (it's your book!), but if there is a running theme throughout negative reviews on a book, then you can the identify weak spots, and vice versus for the positive reviews. This knowledge can help me improve my craft and become a better storyteller.
Did you know, that on average, only 1 review is left for every 100 sales on Amazon? So, seriously, if you like a book, PLEASE LEAVE A NICE REVIEW! That is all.
READING BOOKS MEME:
"Going to the grocery store just isn't a priority when the fate of a fictional character is hanging in the balance."
I'm a writer. If I'm staring at you, I'm not being rude. I'm trying to decide if you need to go in a book. If you're a snot, I may be trying to decide how to kill you.